Slatterns In Wonderland

Slattern Events

2010-06-12T14:31:00.000-07:00

There are two highly anticipated and very important events coming up in the Land O’Slattern. For one, in a few short weeks we will behold the majesty that is Comic Con 2010, a magical realm where the costumes are the real persona and you can encounter Richard Alpert enjoying a stroll through downtown San Diego. Although at the time if I knew he was capable of aging I would have plucked a few of those grey hairs for keeps! At Comic Con there is no better place to be your true self, stalk Joss Whedon, and take a picture with a shedding Chewbacca.

However the enjoyment begins early for me with the True Blood Season 3 premiere. I had the distinct pleasure of attending the show’s panel at last year’s Comic Con where there was no shortage of ill-fitting Merlotte’s waitress uniforms or idiotic questions from spectators (demonstrated in the strip below).

Although Alan Ball’s reaction may not have been quite so severe as I portrayed, the look of appall on his face at the time suggested he was thinking similarly. Curse that Stephanie Meyer for making half human/half vampire babies so gosh darn popular. However, I want to salute Charlaine Harris for writing such a modern vampire lovin’ woman as Sookie Stackhouse who can so enigmatically avoid getting knocked up by a vampire.

In conclusion, heed my warning Twihards: if any one of you so much as create a minute spark of wonder in the minds of any True Blood writer about adding a vampire baby this year, I will douse you in bottles of True Blood Carrie-style!! Though, of course, I learned from Eric to wear my hair back so as not to ruin my new highlights with blood.

MTV Movie Awards

2010-06-07T17:21:00.001-07:00

I have to admit that I've been bored with MTV's movie award show the past few to many years. It had lost the humor of past sketches by Ben Stiller, Jack Black, Jimmy Fallon, and even Lisa Kudrow. So as I was watching this year and laughing almost the entire time, it felt like the good-ole times. If you haven't seen it yet, then you won't understand the next part, so I recommend you set your DVR for one of the many thousand times MTV will replay it - because they always do.

My Favorite Things

**Bad Ass Cops with Lautner and Pattinson wearing awesome mustaches
**Tom Cruise as Les Grossman
**Tom Cruise as Les Grossman dancing with Jennifer Lopez
**Aziz Ansari as Precious (with headband)
**Aziz Ansari as Taavon the Swagga coach
**Tom Cruise as Les Grossman referring to Will Smith as "Fresh Prince"
**Russell Brand referring to Sean Combs as "Puffy," one too many times and he leaves the stage
**StuntKidz
**Mark Wahlberg holding his own with Will Ferrell whilst hanging from a wire

Of course, it wouldn't be a MTV movie awards without the awkwardness of Kristen Stewart. She mumbled a few times and fell at least once.

Plus the f-word was used way too much.

But Sandra Bullock was lovely - as always.

Welcome back MTV Movie Awards!!

Shudder Island. Pun Intended. Yeah, I went there.

2010-02-25T22:40:00.000-08:00

Recently, as I left my local movie theater after witnessing the wonderful Shutter Island (!!!), it dawned on me that, although not in this case, I am often left feeling unfulfilled with book to movie adaptations. I mean, let’s be honest, vampires sparkling in the sun just don’t cut it on screen. However, Scorsese’s magnificent adaptation was beautiful to witness and a necessary part of your movie-going experience right now. Hint, hint, rush out and witness the awesomeness!

Blast from the Past - Buffy Season 2

2010-02-23T19:32:00.000-08:00

I caught the finale again the other day and was reminded again of the integral part of music in our emotional connection to a show and its characters. Because he is a master at all things awesome and heart-wrenching, Joss Whedon picks the perfect songs to accompany pivotal moments. If you know Buffy episodes, you'll remember this one to be where she had to kill Angelus - only for him to become Angel again at the point of no return. Joss uses a great Sarah McLachlan song to end the episode and portray Buffy's internal turmoil.

"Winter here's cold and bitter - chills us to the bone. Haven't seen the sun for weeks - too long too far from home. I feel just like I'm sinking, and I claw for solid ground. I'm pulled down by the undertow. I never thought I could feel so low. Oh darkness, I feel like letting go."

Beautiful and poignant - all in a few minutes. Like I said - Joss is a master at his craft.

A Slattern's Rant for the Week

2010-02-10T22:43:00.000-08:00

As if commercials did not so thoroughly steal our souls already, it has now become necessary to bombard television viewers with product placements advertisements so very apparent in weekly T.V. It appears that the Don Drapers of the world have wised up to the habitual DVR viewers such as myself and my fellow Slattern who wait an appropriate amount of time to watch our favorite shows so as to avoid those pesky ads. Upset with the forceful hand of The Man, many shows such as 30 Rock, Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, and even No Reservations with Anthony Bourdain, are not even attempting to hide their disdain for the practice and seemingly mock these product placements with obvious if not over to top product inclusions. In fact, I am sure that in the near future our favorite characters will be replaced by products themselves. Imagine, for example, the P.C. guy on the Big Bang Theory or one of those Charmin bears with no pants playing Robin’s new co-anchor on How I Met Your Mother.

Better late than never

2010-02-08T20:34:00.000-08:00

Dollhouse Finale (aired 1/29/10)

How can an ending give you such sadness and hope in one package? Joss Whedon is a master at killing beloved characters and then portraying surrounding transactions that are so real and raw they might bring you to tears. We are shown that life is full of joyous hellos and hard good-byes, but the bottom line is that we are all survivors to our core.